Sunday, March 30, 2014

Intelligent Thieves

  NOT ALL THIEVES ARE STUPID 
 ~ 
  ~
1..  Some people in CA 
  ~  
left their car in the long-term parking at San Jose while away, and  someone broke into the car. Using the information on the car's  registration in the glove compartment, they drove the car to the  people's home in Pebble Beach and robbed it. So I guess if we are  going to leave the car in long-term parking, we should NOT leave  the registration/insurance cards in it, nor your remote garage door  opener. This gives us something to think about with all our new  electronic technology.    ~  
2.
  GPS. 
  ~  
Someone had their car broken into while they were at a football  game.
  Their car was parked on the green which was adjacent to  the  football stadium and specially allotted to football fans. 
  ~  

Things stolen from the car included a garage door remote control,  some money and a GPS which had been prominently mounted on  the dashboard.  When the victims got home, they found that their  house had been ransacked and just about everything worth  anything  had been stolen.  The thieves had used the GPS to guide  them to  the  house.  They then used the garage remote control to open the  garage door and gain entry to the house.  The thieves knew the  owners were at the football game, they knew what time the game  was scheduled to finish and so they knew how much time they had  to clean out the house.  It would appear that they had brought a  truck to empty the house of its contents. 
Something to consider if you have a GPS - don't put your home  address in it... Put a nearby address (like a store or gas station) so  you can still find your way home if you need to, but no one else  would know where you live if your GPS were stolen. 
 ~ 
  ~  

3.
  CELL PHONES 
  ~  
I never thought of this... 
This lady has now changed her habit of how she lists her names on  her cell phone after her handbag was stolen. Her handbag, which  contained her cell phone, credit card, wallet, etc., was stolen.
  20  minutes later when she called her hubby, from a pay phone telling  him what had happened, hubby says 'I received your text asking  about our Pin number and I've replied a little while ago.'  When  they rushed down to the bank, the bank staff told them all the  money was already withdrawn.  The thief had actually used the  stolen cell phone to text 'hubby' in the contact list and got hold of  the pin number.  Within 20 minutes he had withdrawn all the  money from their bank account. 
  ~  
Moral of the lesson: 
  ~  
   a. Do not disclose the relationship between you and the 
people in your contact list.  Avoid using names like Home, 
Honey, Hubby, Sweetheart, Dad, Mom, etc... 
  ~      b.  And very importantly, when sensitive info is being asked  through texts, CONFIRM by calling back. 
  ~      c.  Also, when you're being texted by friends or family to meet  them somewhere, be sure to call back to confirm that the message  came from them.  If you don't reach them, be very careful about  going places to meet 'family and friends' who text you.         ~  
4.
  Purse in the grocery cart scam... 
  ~  
A lady went grocery-shopping at a local mall and left her 
purse sitting in the children's seat of the cart while she reached  something off a shelf...wait till you read the WHOLE story! 
Her wallet was stolen, and she reported it to the store personnel.  After returning home, she received a phone call from the Mall  Security to say that they had her wallet and that although there 
was no money in it, it did still hold her personal papers.  She  immediately went to pick up her wallet, only to be told by Mall  Security that they had not called her.  By the time she returned  home again, her house had been broken into and burglarized.  
The thieves knew that by calling and saying they were Mall  Security, they could lure her out of her house long enough 
for them to burglarize it
  ~        * * BE ALERT * *    * PLEASE PASS THIS ON *
 ~
Even if this does not pertain to you...
Pass it on to your family and friends.. 
  ~ 
 

     

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

New Sign At Wal-Mart

New sign at Wal-Mart 
  ~  
  ~  
 Our society is doomed.............. 

IDIOT SIGHTING 
  ~  
I handed the teller @ my bank a withdrawal slip for $400.00 
I said "May I have large bills, please" 


She looked at me and said "I'm sorry sir, all the bills are the same size."
When I got up off the floor I explained it to her.... 
   ~   

IDIOT SIGHTING 
  ~  
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car,  we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department  and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver side door. As I  watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and  discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'it's open!'  His reply: 'I know. I already got that side.'
 


This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, MS

IDIOT SIGHTING 
  ~  
We had to have the garage door repaired. 
The Sears repairman told us that one of our 
problems was that we did not have a 'large' 
enough motor on the opener. 
I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest 
one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. 
He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' 
I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. 
He said, 'NO, it's not..' Four is larger than two.' 


We haven't used Sears repair since. 


IDIOT SIGHTING 
  ~  
My daughter and I went through the McDonald's 
take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. 
Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter. 
She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 
'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back. 
She sighed and went to get the manager, who asked me to repeat my request. 
I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said 'We're sorry but we could  not do that kind of thing.' 
The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change. 


Do not confuse the clerks at McD's. 


IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE 
   ~   
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. 
She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.' 
He said he was sorry, but they only had iceburg lettuce. 
-- From  Kansas City 
  ~   

IDIOT SIGHTING 
   ~   
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, 
'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?' 
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?' 
He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.' 


Happened in Birmingham,  Ala. 


IDIOT SIGHTING 
   ~   
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. 
I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. 
She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. 
I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. 
Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth 
 are blind people doing driving?!' 

She was a probation officer in Wichita, KS 


IDIOT SIGHTING 
   ~   
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker 
who was leaving the company due to 'downsizing,' 
our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. 
We should do this more often.' 
Not another word was spoken. 
We all just looked at each other with 
that deer-in-the-headlights stare. 

This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.
 

IDIOT SIGHTING 
  ~  
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip 
back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't 
understand why her system would not turn on. 
  ~   

A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less. 

IDIOT SIGHTING 
  ~  
How would you pronounce this child's name? 
  ~   
"Le-a" 
Leah?? NO 
Lee - A?? NOPE 
Lay - a?? NO 
Lei??..... Guess Again. 
  ~   
This child attends a school in
Kansas City, Mo. 
Her mother is irate because everyone is getting 
 her name wrong.  It's pronounced "Ledasha". 
When the Mother was asked about the pronunciation 
of the name, she said, "the dash don't be silent." 
   

SO, if you see something come across your desk 
like this please remember to pronounce the dash. 
If dey axe you why, tell dem de dash don't be silent. 

STAY ALERT!


They walk among us...... and they 
VOTE.... Sad but true!
 
  
  

Friday, March 14, 2014

Amazing Jack

His owner is 21 years old and had never trained a dog before.  They live in Litchfield Park near Phoenix
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This is jaw-dropping. You'll want this dog, too! 
  ~   
  

Monday, March 10, 2014

State's Preambles

Do you know your 
State's Preamble? 
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  ~  
Alabama 1901,  Preamble We the people  of the State of Alabama , invoking the  favor and guidance of Almighty God, do ordain and establish the  following Constitution.. 
   
Alaska 1956,  Preamble We, the people of  Alaska , grateful to God  and to those who founded our nation and pioneered this great  land. 
   
Arizona 1911,  Preamble We, the people of  the State of Arizona , grateful to  Almighty God for our liberties, do ordain this Constitution... 
   
Arkansas 1874,  Preamble We, the people of  the State of Arkansas, grateful to  Almighty God for the privilege of choosing our own form of  government... 
   
California 1879,  Preamble We, the People of  the State of California , grateful to  Almighty God for our freedom...
   
Colorado 1876,  Preamble We, the people of  Colorado , with profound  reverence for the Supreme Ruler of Universe...  
   
Connecticut 1818,  Preamble. The People of  Connecticut, acknowledging with gratitude the good Providence of  God in  permitting them to enjoy. 
   
Delaware 1897,  Preamble Through Divine  Goodness all men have, by nature, the rights of worshipping and  serving their Creator according to the dictates of their  consciences. 
  
Florida 1885,  Preamble We, the people of  the State of Florida , grateful to  Almighty God for our constitutional liberty, establish this  Constitution... 
  
Georgia 1777,  Preamble We, the people of  Georgia , relying upon  protection and guidance of Almighty God, do ordain and establish  this Constitution... 
   
Hawaii 1959,  Preamble We , the people of  Hawaii , Grateful for  Divine Guidance ... Establish this Constitution. 
   
Idaho 1889,  Preamble We, the people of  the State of Idaho , grateful to  Almighty God for our freedom, to secure its blessings. 
   
Illinois 1870,  Preamble We, the people of  the State of Illinois, grateful to Almighty God for the civil ,  political and religious liberty which He hath so long permitted  us to enjoy and looking to Him for a blessing on our endeavors. 
   
Indiana 1851,  Preamble We, the People of  the State of Indiana , grateful to  Almighty God for the free exercise of the right to choose our  form of government. 
   
Iowa 1857,  Preamble We, the People of  the St ate of Iowa , grateful to the  Supreme Being for the blessings hitherto enjoyed, and feeling  our dependence on Him for a continuation of these blessings,  establish this Constitution. 
  
Kansas 1859,  Preamble We, the people of  Kansas , grateful to  Almighty God for our civil and religious privileges establish  this Constitution.  
  
Kentucky 1891,  Preamble.. We, the people of  the Commonwealth are grateful to Almighty God for the civil,  political and religious liberties..  
  
Louisiana 1921,  Preamble We, the people of  the State of Louisiana , grateful to  Almighty God for the civil, political and religious liberties we  enjoy.  
  
Maine 1820,  Preamble We the People of  Maine acknowledging with grateful hearts the goodness of the  Sovereign Ruler of the Universe in affording us an opportunity  .. And imploring His aid and direction.  
   
Maryland 1776,  Preamble We, the people of  the state of Maryland , grateful to  Almighty God for our civil and religious liberty... 
  
Massachusetts  1780, Preamble We...the people of  Massachusetts, acknowledging with grateful hearts, the goodness  of the Great Legislator of the Universe In the course of His  Providence, an opportunity and devoutly imploring His  direction. 
   
Michigan 1908,  Preamble.   We,  the people of the State of Michigan , grateful to  Almighty God for the blessings of freedom, establish this  Constitution.  
  
Minnesota, 1857,  Preamble We, the people of  the State of Minnesota, grateful to God for our civil and  religious liberty, and desiring to perpetuate its blessings:  
   
Mississippi  1890, Preamble We, the people of  Mississippi in convention assembled, grateful to Almighty God,  and invoking His blessing on our work.  
  
Missouri 1845,  Preamble We, the people of  Missouri , with profound  reverence for the Supreme Ruler of the Universe, and grateful  for His goodness . Establish this Constitution... 
   
Montana 1889,  Preamble. We, the people of  Montana , grateful to  Almighty God for the  blessings of liberty  establish this Constitution ..  
  
Nebraska 1875,  Preamble We, the people,  grateful to Almighty God for our freedom . Establish this  Constitution. 
  
Nevada 1864,  Preamble We the people of  the State of Nevada , grateful to  Almighty God for our freedom, establish this Constitution...  
  
New Hampshire 1792,  Part I. Art. I. Sec.  V Every individual  has a natural and unalienable right to worship God according to  the dictates of his own conscience. 
  
New Jersey 1844,  Preamble We, the people of  the State of New Jersey, grateful to Almighty God for civil and  religious liberty which He hath so long permitted us to enjoy,  and looking to Him for a blessing on our endeavors. 
   
New Mexico 1911,  Preamble We, the People of  New Mexico, grateful to Almighty God for the blessings of  liberty.. 
  
New York 1846,  Preamble We, the people of  the State of New  York , grateful to  Almighty God for our freedom, in order to secure its  blessings.  
  
North Carolina  1868, Preamble We the people of  the State of North Carolina, grateful to Almighty God, the  Sovereign Ruler of Nations, for our civil, political, and  religious liberties, and acknowledging our dependence upon Him  for the continuance of those... 
  
North Dakota  1889, Preamble We , the people of  North  Dakota , grateful to  Almighty God for the blessings of civil and religious liberty,  do ordain... 
  
Ohio 1852,  Preamble We the people of  the state of Ohio , grateful to  Almighty God for our freedom, to secure its blessings and to  promote our common. 
   
Oklahoma 1907,  Preamble Invoking the  guidance of Almighty God, in order to secure and perpetuate the  blessings of liberty, establish this... 
   
Oregon 1857, Bill of  Rights, Article I Section 2. All  men shall be secure in the Natural right, to worship Almighty  God according to the dictates of their consciences.  
   
Pennsylvania  1776, Preamble We, the people of  Pennsylvania, grateful to Almighty God for the blessings of  civil and religious liberty, and humbly invoking His  guidance... 
   
Rhode  Island 1842,  Preamble. We the People of  the State of Rhode Island grateful to Almighty God for the civil  and religious liberty which He hath so long permitted us to  enjoy, and looking to Him for a blessing... 
   
South  Carolina , 1778,  Preamble We, the people of  he State of South Carolina grateful to God for our liberties,  do ordain and establish this Constitution. 
   
South  Dakota 1889,  Preamble We, the people of  South  Dakota , grateful to  Almighty God for our civil and religious liberties. 
   
Tennessee 1796, Art.  XI..III. That all men have a  natural and indefeasible right to worship Almighty God according  to the dictates of their conscience... 
   
Texas 1845,  Preamble We the People of  the Republic of  Texas , acknowledging, with gratitude, the grace and beneficence of God.      
Utah 1896,  Preamble Grateful to  Almighty God for life and liberty, we establish this Constitution. 
   
Vermont 1777,  Preamble Whereas all  government ought to enable the individuals who compose it to  enjoy their natural rights, and other blessings which the Author  of Existence has bestowed on man.. 
   
Virginia 1776,  Bill of Rights, XVI Religion, or the Duty which we owe our Creator can be directed  only by Reason and that it is the mutual duty of all to practice  Christian Forbearance, Love and Charity towards each other. 
   
Washington 1889,  Preamble We the People of  the State of Washington, grateful to the Supreme Ruler of the  Universe for our liberties, do ordain this Constitution. 
   
West Virginia  1872, Preamble Since through  Divine Providence we enjoy the blessings of civil, political and  religious liberty, we, the people of West Virginia reaffirm our  faith in and constant reliance upon God ... 
    
Wisconsin 1848,  Preamble We, the people of  Wisconsin, grateful to Almighty God for our freedom, domestic  tranquility.... 
    
Wyoming 1890,  Preamble We, the people of  the State of Wyoming , grateful to God  for our civil, political, and religious liberties, establish  this Constitution...
  ~    After reviewing acknowledgments of God from all 50 state constitutions, one is faced with the prospect that maybe, the ACLU and the out-of-control federal courts are wrong!   If you found this to be 'Food for thought' send it to as many as you think will be enlightened as I hope you were.
  
~    (Please note that at no time is anyone told that they MUST worship  God.)
   ~   
Let us bring God back into America! 
 ~ 
GOD BLESS AMERICA!

  ~   

Sunday, March 2, 2014

GETTING OLDER?

GETTING OLDER? ME TOO. 
 ~ 
  ~ 
A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor's office.
"Is it true," she wanted to know, "that the medication
you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?"
"'Yes, I'm afraid so,"' the doctor told her. There was a moment of silence
before the senior lady replied, "I'm wondering, then,
just how serious is my condition because this prescription is marked
'NO REFILLS'."

***********************
An older gentleman was on the operating table
awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son,
a renowned surgeon, perform the operation.
As he was about to get the anesthesia,
he asked to speak to his son. "Yes, Dad, what is it?"
"Don't be nervous, son; do your best,
and just remember, if it doesn't go well,
if something happens to me, your mother
is going to come and live with you and your wife...."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Aging:
Eventually you will reach a point
when you stop lying about your age
and start bragging about it. This is so true. I love
to hear them say "you don't look that old.."
---------------------------------
Ah, being young is beautiful,
but being old is comfortable.
*********
First you forget names,
then you forget faces.
Then you forget to pull up your zipper....
it's worse when
you forget to pull it down.
````````````````

Two guys, one old, one young,
are pushing their carts around Wal-Mart
when they collide.
The old guy says to the young guy,
"Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife,
and I guess I wasn't paying attention
to where I was going."
The young guy says, "That's OK, it's a coincidence.
I'm looking for my wife, too...
I can't find her and I'm getting a little desperate."
The old guy says, "Well,
maybe I can help you find her...
what does she look like?"
The young guy says,
"Well, she is 27 yrs. old, tall,
with red hair,
blue eyes, is buxom... wearing no bra,
long legs,
and is wearing short shorts.
What does your wife look like?'
To which the old guy says, "Doesn't matter,
--- let's look for yours."
(Great One!)
*********************
(And this final one especially for me,)
"Lord,
keep Your arm around my shoulder
and Your hand over my mouth!"

Now, if you feel this doesn't apply to you . . .
stick around awhile . . . it will!

  ~  
  ~