Lovemaking Tips For
Seniors
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~
1. Wear your glasses
to make sure your partner is actually in the
bed. ~
2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle. ~
3. Set the mood with lighting. (Turn them ALL OFF!) ~
4. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin. ~
5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember. ~
6. Use extra poly-grip so your teeth don't end up under the bed. ~
7. Have Panadol ready in case you actually complete the act. ~
8. Make all the noise you want.....the neighbors are deaf, too. ~
9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news! ~
10. Don't even think about trying it twice
2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle. ~
3. Set the mood with lighting. (Turn them ALL OFF!) ~
4. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin. ~
5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember. ~
6. Use extra poly-grip so your teeth don't end up under the bed. ~
7. Have Panadol ready in case you actually complete the act. ~
8. Make all the noise you want.....the neighbors are deaf, too. ~
9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news! ~
10. Don't even think about trying it twice
in one night! ~
~ 'OLD' IS WHEN.... He/she says, 'Let's go upstairs and make love,' and you answer, 'Pick one; I can't do both!' ~
'OLD' IS WHEN...
Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot. ~
'OLD' IS WHEN...
Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face. ~
'OLD' IS WHEN....
You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along. ~
'OLD' IS WHEN... You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police. ~
'OLD' IS WHEN..
'Getting a little action' means you don't need to take a laxative today. ~
'OLD' IS WHEN...
'Getting lucky' means you find your car in the parking lot. ~
'OLD' IS WHEN... An 'all nighter' means not getting up to use the bathroom. ~
'OLD' IS WHEN... You're not sure if these are facts or jokes.
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(I sent this in large type so you can read it)
(I sent this in large type so you can read it)
~
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